Archive for March, 2006


March 31, 2006

Alright, kids. I don’t know about where you are, but right now in Syracuse it is 62 degrees outside, and it’s going to reach 78. If that doesn’t give you happy pants, then you must just be about dead inside.

Sooo…Class dismissed. The time you’d normally spend reading me, go outside for a breath of fresh air! Go on, leave. Go outside and enjoy the day! Stop staring at this screen, stand up, and spend 5 minutes outside, just enjoying the day.

And this isn’t a cop out entry just because I’m still feeling last night a little. Not at all in the slightest. Just thought I’d tell you that so you can just WIPE that thought from your heads.

Undergoing Internal Renovations

March 30, 2006

I talked to you all about a problem that has been really hard for me to deal with awhile ago. Well, it’s progressed.

All the sudden, one day, it hit me. I’ve no idea what is going on in this person’s life. I don’t know anything about him anymore, yet I would still get myself worked up over this whole situation when it is very apparent, nearly 5 months after he needed a ‘break’, that he has no intention of ever trying to resolve the problem. I’m insignificant to him, yet I am still wondering and waiting. Pathetic or not pathetic?


So I emailed him. I know I said that I wouldn’t do that because I refused to be put in the position as the person who is delivering the bad news. But it had moved to a level of pure disrespect. All the email said was I’m done. Goodbye.

I thought about writing a big long email, telling him why I can’t wait on this. Explaining my reasoning. Then I realized he doesn’t deserve that. I don’t have to explain myself to people like that [ie those who condone and take part of bigoted behavior], because I don’t owe them anything.

I used to be a roller coaster. Someone whom I’ve trusted more than any other person, who knew me better than anyone, had turned their back on me. This is the first time in my life where I had that mutual best friendship. The one where someone could say to either of us Who’s your best friend? and we’d both answer the other person. It was hard.

Other times I got so angry. Angry to the point where I wished unhappiness on him, so that I know he feels as bad as I do. I fantasize about being able to just yell at him, insult him or embarrass him in some way that when I look at him, I know he hurts. I even day dreamed about going off on his girlfriend by calling her a homely looking bitch who smiles like a dog [which isn’t nice. Witty and true, maybe. But not nice].

I hated that feeling. The feeling of wanting to cause someone else pain. To get back at someone. It disturbs me that I could feel this way about someone, never mind that this someone used to be my best friend. I’m disgusted with myself that I want to do these things.

It was all because of that feeling. When you see someone who hurt you a LOT, and they are having the time of their lives. So you wonder if they even feel sorry for what they did at all. Because they sure don’t look like they ever felt bad for a single second, and you’re left feeling like an ass for ever caring.

That was awhile ago, though. Now, I’ve reached the point where I know I’m better off. I have my friends. There’s no need to waste my time on someone as worthless as he. And I began to get better.

Until word reached me that the girlfriend began spreading lies about me. This is where the whole scenario turns into a giant Springer storyboard. She had been going around saying that I hate her because I want him. While I admit there were feelings at one time, I had gotten over those, and he and I were rebuilding our friendship.

The thing that really got me was that I was being referred to as John The Gay RA. To whittle me down to nothing more than my sexuality is extremely belittling, not to mention highly insensitive of the person doing it. I decided this needed to be addressed, and I emailed him, asking him to tell his girlfriend to please put a stop to this. I got a little sassy in the email, saying While I appreciate the new surname of John ‘The Gay RA’, I’ve become somewhat attached to my real name over the past few years. No response.

A week later, I was at happy hour when a friend approached me and told me that some people were talking about me. Some of the things these people [who are friends of the girlfriend] were saying were right on par with what was being spread about me. I went home. For some reason, whenever I hear people gossiping about me, I feel dirty. I emailed again, basically saying keep my name out of her mouth. No response.

I know there are people who played no role in this story, now, who have a completely perverted sense of what actually happened. Every so often a tiny word gets back to me. But whatever. I’ve got less than 40 days left, and then I’m off to the real world. It is a great relief to think about that.

And maybe if the girlfriend got stung in the face by a bee and had an allergic reaction that ended up being permanent, thereby leaving her in a perpetual state of elephantiasis of the head, drawing crowds of children who pay each other a dollar to run up and touch the lumpy lady. That’d be nice, too.

Oh. And please donate to fight cancer. Pleeeease.

[Thanks very much to those who already have!]

I Need A Favor, Internet

March 29, 2006

I was going to post another video today, but I thought that this was a bit more important. Not to worry, though, I’ll get to finishing the editing job and what not and have another video up by the end of the week.

I’m not sure if any of you know what Relay For Life is, but just in case, I’ll explain it to you. All over the country, people form teams and have a relay. The purpose of the event is to raise money for cancer research as well as to honor the survivors and victims of this disease. Relay goes all night, and team members take turns in walking for a cure, so to speak. Every team member raises money, which goes towards their team goal. Teams also have the ability to raise money during the event.

For example, I’m a member on Team Bailomos. Or however Enrique spells that damn song. See, my group decided that we would hold an all night dance party, where you would pay a small nominal fee to enter. Once you get onto the boogie floor of fun, we each will teach you a dance. Fun right? And all the money we raise there will go towards cancer research as well. %100.

So this is where you come in, Internet. I’m asking you all for two things. The first being donations. I cannot tell you how much I would appreciate your support in this. The more money we raise, the closer we are getting towards a cure. So if you could please find it in your hearts to visit my Relay For Life site and drop a few dollars into the bucket, that would be incredible of you.

The second thing I’m asking is for some traffic help. The amount of money I could raise would increase 10 fold if you would advertise this on your own personal site, asking your own readers for donations. Just link to either this post or my Relay site and ask your readers to please join the effort for a cure. I can’t begin to imagine how much money I could raise if all of you readers advertised to all of YOUR readers…it would be wonderful.

Just to let you know, I receive absolutely NO money from ANY of this. All of the donations go straight to the American Cancer Society, an amazing organization dedicated to supporting those affected by cancer and to helping put a stop to this horrible disease.

So please help me make this year’s donation the biggest yet. This will be my third time at Relay, and I want to make it the best of my college career. If you could please make a donation to this wonderful cause, I would be extraordinarily grateful.

My Relay For Life site.

*I forgot. Sometimes, people are uncomfortable making donations or purchases online. If that is the case, and you still want to donate, then you have two choices. You can either print off a donation form and go from there, or you can send a check written out to Relay For Life to me. If you want to mail a check to me, email me and I will give you an address to send it to.

This Is The First Time I Think Coffee Has Ever Been Used As A Euphemism

March 28, 2006

Last Friday, I needed to be surrounded by gay people. A lot of gay people.

Every so often, I get these hunger pains for things. For example, I’ve had a craving for meat that I can’t even begin to describe to you. I want an animal that was killed, cut and cooked in front of me with a big baked potato right next to it. I don’t know why, I just need a slab of steak. I’m getting light headed, let’s move on.

So the other week, my hunger was for my people. I don’t think people totally realize what it’s like to go out on a Friday or Saturday night for me. Normally, the evening’s events are at a bar down the street from the University. Or downtown. Or a house party. Either which way, it is more or less a straight place. I’m usually the only gay person there, and that can get old. It’s hard to describe.

Think of it as walking into a room and being the only person with a head. No one else may realize you have a head, because they don’t have a head and don’t realize what it is like to have a head. But you DO have a head, and you realize that you’re different than everyone else in the room. You can still have fun with the headless people, but you’re still the only one with a head.

I think that covers it.

So myself, Jess on my staff and her friend Mel went out to see some gay people. Quick aside. When I ask my straight friends to go to a gay bar or club with me, I get a lot of questions. What should I wear? or What type of dancing do you do there? and Can I get in?

The answers being Whatever shows off the goods, You can only dance with the same sex, or they throw you out and Only if you promise the drag queen she can play with you for 5 minutes in the back room.

The thing that pisses me off, though, is when someone says Maybe I shouldn’t go. I don’t want someone to think I’m gay and have to tell them I’m not. Because that would be just horrendous, wouldn’t it? Like I don’t assume the role of a straight man [involuntarily] every time we go into Chuck’s. Suck it up, Breeder. You’re dancing with the queers tonight.

So we all walk into a new gay bar that I’ve been wanting to check out. We were there for about 2 minutes before I realized it was the best place in the world. If you wanted a luke warm piece of old gay ass.

I don’t think anyone’s life is complete until you see two 50 year old lesbians slow grinding to Don’t Cha by the Pussycat Dolls all alone on the dance floor. It’s magical.

We made our exit and headed to our regular gay club, Spirits. It was more or less dead, and we considered leaving UNTIL we discovered what they were playing. Gay. Family. Fued. Apparently, 100 drunk gay people were surveyed, and the answer was always boner. Go figure.

We formed our own team, and one round later, we emerged victorious. With mugs. Which was great, because you can never have too many free mugs. As we were leaving, though, a guy came up to me, all sketchy and drunk, and said I’ll trade you for that mug.

I liked my mug. And he’s sketchy and drunk. So…no.

But he kept asking. And he kept being sketchier and sketchier about it. Like, I’ll trade you…we can make a deal…right? Hmm? all the while making weird eyebrow motions and standing way too close to me.

I finally put my foot down and said I’m sorry. I really want this mug. I’ll be having coffee in it every single morning. I’m not a random hook-er up-er, and I’m not going to turn into one for Randy McHornyson and his active brow line.

His flirty face immediately gave way to the most bitter look I’ve ever seen. Without missing a beat, he gets all huffy and says Fine. You just won’t be having any CREAM in that coffee. And he stormed off, leaving me alone with my mug and without a non-dairy creamer. So sad.

After that, we went to another club where Jess danced with a transvestite cowgirl on stage, made out with a boy who may or may not be gay, and took her place as a Go-Go Girl on a podium for a majority of the night.

Thanks, gays, for a fantastic night.

How I Know I’m The Laziest Person Ever

March 28, 2006

Sometimes I wear the same pair of jeans several days in a row because that way I don’t have to put on a new belt or move my wallet, cash and spare change to another pair of pants. I’ve been wearing the pants I’m wearing now for 3 days.

Elvis Costello and Sugar Packets

March 27, 2006

Like I promised you all, here is some more video from SxSW. As I said, this is an undying blog topic. With all the footage I took, I’ll be editing until graduation day.

Anywho, I’ve got two videos today. Both are from Fray Cafe, which I already told you guys all about. The first one I’ve got is of Steve Garfield, who runs one of my daily reads, Off On A Tangent, as well as some fun vlogs. Actually, along with Amy Carpenter, he got me interested in vlogging and what not. Thanks Steve!

Here is Steve telling his story at Fray…

Next, we have the creator of Fray, Derek Powazek. I had the pleasure of running into Derek during one of the last nights of SxSW Interactive, outside the closing party. After a brief conversation, I let him know that I have creepy tendencies and film people when they don’t know it in order to post it on my site in my dire need to create blog fodder. Not being nearly as put off as I thought, he gave me his card and wished me luck.

Then probably remembered my face in order to avoid it in crowds.

Derek had two more stories after this, but my camcorder unfortunately died shortly after this. Not to put down both him and Heather, but I can only withstand one story of love at a time. If I don’t pace myself in terms of things like this, it can get ugly. In the right [or wrong, as the case could very well be] mood, a Disney movie can get me teary eyed.

Please stop by both Steve and Derek’s sites and give a hello. And hopefully, next time around, all of you will be present to hear their next stories in person, and not via my crappy little video.

I Won’t Be Posting From Home Right Now Because…

March 24, 2006

I’m staying at the lovely Bethanny’s apartment tonight.

Why? I’m drunk. And I love her.

Beth and I lived on the same floor freshmen year, and we’ve been friends ever since. Don’t tell her, but the real reason is because her entire family makes a mean chocolate chip cookie. I stay with her just for those morsels. Because they are better than an orgasm. 10x better, in fact.

Anyways, expect a video of Fray on Monday. I didn’t have time to edit it tonight. Because I’m at Beth’s. And drunk.

Also. Here we are. Aren’t we cute?

Isn’t she lovely? Yes. She is.

So, until Monday! And maybe I will have some video for you from CANADA!

Real Quick…

March 23, 2006

A few people have emailed me saying they can’t see the video. Which is weird, because a lot of other people can.

If you can’t see the short video below, could you please email me? My contact stuff is on the right in the sidebar. Just let me know some of the general stuff, like what you use for a media player, web browser etc.

In fact, let me give a quick word right now. If you use Internet Explorer, take it into the back yard and shoot it. Then bury it. Then forget about it.

Download Firefox. It’s a hell of a lot better than anything else you can get on a PC. And if you are using a Mac, you’re already using Safari. Or maybe even Opera.

Also, I’m doing my movies in Quicktime. So make sure you’re fully updated in terms of that [here is the link for Windows users].

If you have any questions, though, or are still having problems viewing the stuff I put up, please let me know. I’m going to be doing a lot of videos as I want to make it a staple of the site, so I want you all to be able to experience the full effect that is Come To Find Out.

And can I say that I was putting up videos WEEKS before someone ELSE who shall remain NAMELESS.


More Southby…Which Will Be A Recurring Title Till The Day I Die…Or Go There Next Year

March 23, 2006

One of the experiences that I enjoyed the most from SxSW were the after parties.

By the way. Everyone? Go to SxSW Interactive. We should all go. I paid about $200 bucks for registration, but the amount of free shit I got is mind boggling. Free hat. Free t-shirt. Lots of fun little stuff, like a booklet of stickers, a mini sharpie and other swag stuff. TONS of business cards…I neeeed to email back all these people I met to thank them…and the booze. Jesus himself would have been impressed with the amount of alcohol pulled from the void at this conference. You make up the price of it all via the alcohol itself.

Oh. And I also found where I want to work after graduation. I’m going to the career center for help on my resume and what not on Friday, because that is how much I really want this job. For real real. Homie.

So anyways, one of the best parties I went to was Fray Cafe. Created by Derek Powazek [he’s too hot and fancy for just one site], Fray is where people get together and just tell stories. I have two stories filmed [again…editing is a bitch lover, so expect some video up either Friday or Monday] that I know you will all love. About 200 people or so crowded together to hear story after story, each one as good [if not better] than the previous.

Also. It helped that Eric Rice got up on stage before it all started and said that all drinks would be on Audio Blog for the night. I wish I knew this earlier because I would have gotten drunk enough to get up there myself and tell a story. By the time I had the required 5 rum and cokes to make an ass out of myself, the list to tell a story was enormous.

I think one of my favorite stories told was by a Fray aficionado, Glenda. I won’t go into detail about her entire story, but I will say it involved George Lucas, hanging with his ex-girlfriend, and his apparent Asian fetishes. Highly. Entertaining.

Like I said yesterday, I didn’t take any pictures. However, about ten thousand other people did. If you go to Flickr, you can search SxSW and take a gander. Click here and, uh, here to see some.

Apparently, though, some people felt I was photogenic enough to waste some film. Here I am here [I’ve no idea who that person is in the picture with me slash don’t judge me, I was tired from the car ride] here.

And here are some other fun photos. I tried to paste them into this post, but I guess they are protected from freeloaders, like myself. Stingy.

Red Eyed Fly is so cool. This place is just a huge permanent tent kind of thing to the right of an outside stone porch overlooking a steep hill and some of the city. Very cool.

Glenda up on stage.
Derek telling his story [which you will see soon!].
Eric Rice, our rock star host.

You Can Just Call Me John Speilberg From Now On

March 22, 2006

I know you all want pictures from SxSW.

Well…I don’t know how to tell you all this, really. But I didn’t take any.

I DID take lots of video, though. And I’m slowly working my way through it to piece together little bits of footage for you all. Seriously, editing is fucking hard. Like, tedious and precise hard. It’s almost like Operation, only instead of those convienent little pliers you get in the box, you have to use the jaws of life.

It’s gotten easier to make movies, though, so hopefully the next ones will be better. Until then, please enjoy this little movie I put together. This was the first night in Texas when I went bowling in Ft. Worth [where we stopped for a night before going to Austin].

Many thanks to Lez, who’s grace, skill and thirst for beer made this project possible.

UPDATE: The name of the song playing in the video is Fuego by Bond. Check them out.