Because There’s Nothing Sexier Or More Romantic Than Talking About Herpes

I haven’t put on a program for my floor in awhile, so I’ve been debating what I should do. Personally, I hate the regular type of programs, like root beer pong. God. If I don’t do another alcohol related program surrounding roofies, BAC levels and what to do if your roommate pukes all over themselves, it will be too soon.

I decided to use the holiday from hell as my muse. Valentine’s Day. If anyone out there likes this holiday, then I don’t like you. Everywhere you look, there are couples who are touching kissing and being a general pulsing pimple on the face of the world. Not to mention the whole idea of picking one day to celebrate love is just insane. Why not pick a day to celebrate bowel movements or antiquing or infomercials or hummus?

No. To pick one day is just ridiculous. All these things, like love, should be celebrated all the time.

I just quivered a little. That is the sappiest thing I’ve ever said EVER. Ugh.

Anyways, I was trying to think how I could incorporate Pulsing Pimple Day in my programming when it struck me. What does everyone who’s lucky enough to have a Pulsing Pimple do on Pulsing Pimple Day? They have sex. And there we have it.

Sex with John. Monday night. In the lounge. 10 pm. Get ready for a good time.

If no one shows up, I’m going to be pissed off.

9 Responses to “Because There’s Nothing Sexier Or More Romantic Than Talking About Herpes”

  1. The_Scumfrog Says:

    I like the whole pulsing pimple day idea. Im now going to call Valentine’s Day PPD for short. Then no one will know what the fuck im talking about. Anyway in case no one shows for “sex with john” you can always stick to my PPD ritual of popping bubble wrap and eating chocolate that mom sent you.

  2. emily Says:

    i want to show up… just so i can see who DOES show up.

  3. Sandra Dee Says:

    OMG. I’m rolling. Pulsing pimple day. Awesome.

  4. Irish Eyes Says:

    i want a day for bowel movements aka BM aka me

  5. Illusha Nokhrin Says:

    I believe it was Liz from Real Life Comics who first coined the term “SAD”, or Single’s Awareness Day, when talking about Valentine’s.

  6. aka Brandi Says:

    Sex with John starts in 2 hours! Hope you have a group so you don’t have to do the job for yourself!

  7. leahpeah Says:

    isn’t there a Hummus Day?

  8. Melanhead Says:

    I’m piggybacking on Bridie, but let’s call it Irritable Bowel Syndrome Day.

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