Last night after dinner, while rushing to the subway to get out of the -50 degree weather, God and the Baby Jesus decided that my day was too positive, and that not enough negativity existed in my life. So they remedied the situation by way of two police officers, a summons and a $100 fine.
While going through the revolving door in the subway station, I realized my Metro card wasn’t working. I usually have a monthly pass, but it had just expired, so I began fumbling around at the ticket machine trying to buy just a $2, single ride ticket. My co-worker offered me his card to use, but I said I felt bad stealing a ride from him, so I’ll just hop in and share a fare.
Let me just say that out of all the dumb shit I have done in this city, I should be grateful that this is what I get busted for.
Two cops walk over to us and ask “You know why we’re talking to you, right?”. Thus began a 30 minute process of us sitting in the Union Square subway police station, getting written up, fined $100 [each!] and being summoned to court sometime in December. For sharing a $2 subway ride.
I’ll definitely be paying for both tickets because it was my dumb ass that applied the ’sharing is caring’ philosophy to the turnstile. But first I’m going to see what I can do about getting the fine reduced [if not eliminated entirely], because I just sat down to do the math, and that is a 5,000% increase.
And if I do end up spending $200 on this, the family isn’t getting a damn thing from me on Christmas besides a hug, some high fives and a homemade card.
